things undone and my blogroll
Which is also undone, for that matter.
not my cat
Looking around my house this afternoon I noticed that my fridge is freshly cleaned but my kitchen is a mess; all the laundry is washed and dried, but not put away; my mom is all washed and in bed, but her bathroom is only partly cleaned; cat is fed, but she needs water; my… well, no reason to go on and on. You get the idea. I think I may have a problem with finishing things. Or, rather, finishing things which can never really be considered finished. Cycles don’t just end, after all. They come to a stopping place (sometimes) and then start over again.
Me, I think I’ve decided to eliminate the stopping place and just have one cycle roll over into the next, as it’s going to do it anyway. The annoying thing about that, though, is that I never really feel done. With anything (that comes to mind at the moment). Even with a completely clean and laundered house, watered cat, fresh mom and rested self, I tend to get that little niggling feeling that there, surely, is something else yet to do, even if I have no desire or intention of doing it, whatever it is.
Perhaps I should take up meditation. I’ve never been very good at that, though.
I’m not certain any of this has anything to do with my blogroll, but there it is – for some reason, adding people to my blogroll brought on this train of thought. Possibly because that too is a thing that is never really complete. Oh, I guess for some people it is, who add whoever they are going to and that’s that, but for many the basic list is only the beginning.
On that subject I have to make a confession: not only am I, often, a Bad Blogger but I am even more so a Bad Blogroller. Mine is always beginning and never really moving past that. Some people, I know, have huge lists, really long rolls of sites so what I do, when I want to find a new site or an old favorite I’ve lost the address for, is head on over to someone who actually maintains a blogroll and click from there. I always mean to have a really long list, but, well… there you go.
Maybe it has something to do with not accumulating stuff. I don’t, you know, in my offline life. I use my computers until they are, in essence, dented, rusted out and the bumpers are falling off. I’m fine with my clothes, year after year, as long as they are not stained and don’t have too many holes (holey clothing always seeming pass in and out of fashion). I have a few sentimental pieces of antique furniture and some artwork I am fond of, but other than that… Part of it is no doubt due to the fact that I hate shopping, and have money to burn only in rare instances. That can’t be all of it, though. When I was making much more money working in sales or in other jobs and had plenty to burn, I was not much different.
Hmmm. The bulk of my work is stored online. There is little here, inanimate, that has a permanency in my life, that I would grieve over if parted from. Even my cat is a temporary cat, and has been for 17 years now – living with me only until I find her a good home.
You know – it occurs to me that I live, have always lived, ready to leave. And why not? We left a lot, when I was growing up. Still, I should think I’d be over that by now, at my age.
This bears thinking on. Funny what new vistas blogrolls will lead you to, no?
Nanette is | Topic: bellybutton bedazzlement, in with the woo, questioning ramble | Tags: None
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