Serenity… refocus – seek joy – thrive

I wanted to write. And to finish what I wrote. That’s why I started these online classes last fall, so that I would learn to be structured a bit, have deadlines to meet and actually get things done.

 (graphic from here)

So far, that’s working out well, for classes anyway. While grades don’t mean much in the overall scheme of things, particularly at my age and time of life, it pains me to get anything less than an A (or maybe an A-), so even though I find much of the material boring, I do it. And I am learning what I wanted to learn, so all’s good.

And one thing I am learning to like and, better yet, use, is outlining. I’ve resisted that for years, for what reason I don’t know. Perhaps I felt it stifled creativity, or that “real writers” should be able to just sit down and rattle things off and wind up with masterpieces. No doubt some can, but I am coming to the conclusion that I am not one of them. Usually. Okay, sometimes I can get inspired and write thoughts as they come and what comes out may not be pretty or grammatically correct but the passion is there, and that calls to some people in some way. Or like now, when I’m just pretty much thinking out loud, this is easy.
(graphic via How to Podcast)

However, writing with intent, that’s where I’ve always had trouble, I guess because of the way my mind works. See, I can have a hurricane of a brainstorm and make mind maps that look like the spawn of Medusa, but after that I’m stuck. How do I get all that mess from there to here? This is why I am not good at anagrams and have a tough time figuring out vanity license plates sometimes. Jumbled letters are just jumbled letters to me. If I really work at it, I can make some puny words out of them but I remain in awe of people who can take one look and pluck out a ten letter word, or something.

Anyway, it’s the same when I look at my mind maps, or any like thing. I am intimidated and feel hopeless that I can ever put anything together from them, so most often they languish somewhere on my computer until they die. Or until my computer does, which used to happen all the time.

So, back to outlining. I think that might be the answer. If I can, with a brain map or just scribbles on a notepad, let my thoughts roam and create and come up with ideas and connections and then corral it all into a full sentence outline, I believe I will then be able to just sit down and write what I intend. And finish it, because I will already have all that main parts. It will take, though, a commitment of time and discipline, but it will be worth it if I can then write something of substance or can just say things I’ve wanted to say.

I’m going to try it, anyway.

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 23rd, 2010 at 7:10 am and is filed under organizing me, writing. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.